Andrew Ducker (andrewducker) wrote,
Andrew Ducker

I just said goodbye to my eldest child

That's Sophia dropped back off to nursery for the first time since Christmas.

I've been feeling bad for feeling good about it up until now, but my overwhelming feeling right now is a slightly tearful overwhelm.

She didn't cry today. She was a little bit overwhelmed with trying to explain to me what was going to happen today, and a bit solemn when she stepped through the door to the carer, but she waved goodbye to me and blew me a kiss.

It's definitely the right thing to do. As Jane reminds me, she really needs the socialisation. We went to the play park two days ago and she just got frightened at how many children were playing there (and it wasn't *that* many). This is the same as the first lockdown, and she was much better with other kids after two weeks back.

I suspect tomorrow there will be tears at drop-off, as she realises that she's back for good. But hopefully I'm wrong and she looks forward to it. She's talked about her nursery friends several times when she was off, and is clearly now reaching the age where she wants to play with other kids, even if they are a bit scary.

I just want her to have some stability. She was in first nursery for four months, then we moved.
Second nursery for three months, and then Jane got through to me that it wasn't a good fit for Sophia.
Third nursery (much better) for four months and then lockdown for four months.
Then back to third nursery again (but in a different room) for five months, then lockdown 2 for two months. And now back to nursery three again, for the third time. Hopefully this sticks!
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