Andrew Ducker (andrewducker) wrote,
Andrew Ducker
andrewducker

De gustibus non est disputandum

I found the following of the "Top ten jokes of the Edinburgh Comedy Festival" funny.

Tim Vine "I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again."
39(12.3%)
David Gibson "I'm currently dating a couple of anorexics. Two birds, one stone."
25(7.9%)
Emo Philips "I picked up a hitch hiker. You've got to when you hit them."
28(8.9%)
Jack Whitehall "I bought one of those anti-bullying wristbands when they first came out. I say 'bought', I actually stole it off a short, fat ginger kid."
29(9.2%)
Gary Delaney "As a kid I was made to walk the plank. We couldn't afford a dog."
56(17.7%)
John Bishop "Being an England supporter is like being the over-optimistic parents of the fat kid on sports day."
12(3.8%)
Bo Burnham "What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? Names."
23(7.3%)
Gary Delaney "Dave drowned. So at the funeral we got him a wreath in the shape of a lifebelt. Well, it's what he would have wanted."
51(16.1%)
Robert White "For Vanessa Feltz, life is like a box of chocolates: Empty."
16(5.1%)
Gareth Richards "Wooden spoons are great. You can either use them to prepare food. Or, if you can't be bothered with that, just write a number on one and walk into a pub…"
34(10.8%)
None of the above
3(0.9%)

Best joke

1
9(11.7%)
2
5(6.5%)
3
3(3.9%)
4
2(2.6%)
5
24(31.2%)
6
0(0.0%)
7
6(7.8%)
8
12(15.6%)
9
0(0.0%)
10
4(5.2%)
All of them were terrible
12(15.6%)


via gonzo21
List from here (along with ten worst - two of which I liked).
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