August 24th, 2009

Illuminati

A maze of twisty little passages, all alike

A friend of mine has been having a bit of a frustrating time:
*Two weeks ago*

ME: Hello ecommerce solution provider. I can't get a valid response from your server. I think you've given us the wrong shared encryption key.
THEM: Could you try changing the order of the items in the form?
ME: Yes, okay... no that doesn't work.

*days later*

ME: Hello? It still doesn't work.
THEM: Are you sure you're encrypting the data correctly?
ME: Yes.
THEM: Are you *sure*?
ME: Yes. I think you've given us the wrong encryption key.
THEM: We are escalating your query. A different customer services person will help you now.
ME: Um, okay.

*days later*

THEM: What's the nature of the problem?
ME: Oh God no. *Explains everything from the start including the bit about me being sure they've given us the wrong key*.
THEM: Change these server settings.
ME: Okay. Um that doesn't change anything.
THEM: We are escalating your query!
ME: No... don't ... do ... that...

*days pass*

THEM: What's the nature of the problem?
ME: Aaaargh! *explains everything again*
THEM: Ah, I see the problem. You don't have the right encryption key.
ME: *uncontrollable sobbing*