Come *on* and give me cancer, I'll spit up the tumor and butter my *bread* with the juice! I'm *fuel-injected*, I'll live forever and remember it afterwards! My physical type *cannot* be classified by science, my `familiar' is a python, I feed it dinosaurs! I take drugs! I pick the fucking terror of the god damn bodiless fiends out of my *brow*. Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke! I use a triceratops for a prophylactic; I'm *thicker, harder* and *meaner* than the Alaskan Pipeline, and carry more spoor!
From The Subgenius Brag Generator, courtesy of the ever-cuddly drainboy.