pointed me towards this
project to produce 50-word versions of favourite stories.
A few favourites of mine so far:
Shakespeare, Hamlet :
Hamlet: You killed my father, prepare to die!
Everyone (including Hamlet) : *dies*
The Female Eunuch
Greir: "Men are evil. Did you really need to pay $5.25 to find this out?"
Vladimir Nabokov, Lolita
Humbert Humbert: Woe is me! I love little girls.
Dolly: Fabulous. Give me your money. I'm out.
Niccolo Machiavelli, The Prince
Machiavelli: In a perfect world you will be loved and people will let you lead. This isn't that world. If you can't control them, kill them - all of them.
Earth: I'm a Libra.
Crowley: It's a baby! It's the Apocalypse!
Aziraphale: It's the Apocalypse! It's ineffable!
Adam: I am Just William! Only with powers!
God: Well, fuck. What went wrong? Everyone was supposed to die.