April 28th, 2003


Plans dashed once more

The plan was that I'd go to work today. I didn't feel fine yesterday, but I certainly felt better enoughthat I assumed that by today I'd be well enough to go in an infect a few more people.

My body, however, seemed determined to be as disruptive as possible. I couldn't get to sleep - I felt tired, but at the same time not sleepy at all. Whenever I did start to drift off (into strange dreams) I'd start coughing. I propped myself up in bed at a t30 degree angle and took a cough sweet, which stopped me coughing as long as I was awake, but the second I fell asleep again I woke myself up. Eventually, at 3:30ish I gave up and took a Nytol. I then proceeded to slowly fall asleep by 4-ish.

So when my alarm went off at 8:00 this morning, I was in no state to do anything. I vaguely remember sending an email to my manager telling her I wouldn't be in, after which it's all blank until 11:00. And to be honest, I suspect that if I had gone in I'd now be home again, as I feel dizzy and vaguely weak as it is. Dammit, I'm nearly at the end of a project - why couldn't I have got it finished before I was off? I hate having work hanging over me like that!

It's not natural!

In discussion with the statuesque Sana about drinking, the fact that it's assumed that people drink came up. Drinking is seen as something that you need an excuse not to do. It's become part of the natural order. Much like refined sugar - the first mass-production of refined sugar wasn't until 1872, but it's now almost impossible to buy anything without sugar in it and people assume that sugary foods are a necessary part of the normal diet. Which leaves me wondering - what other things are considered natural parts of human existence, but are anything but?

What accepted part of society do you wish people would question?



Sana came round and I spent a pleasant afternoon chatting to her and Erin and watching Friends and Simpsons.

So when Erin said she was going to the cinema I decided I was feeling far better and I'd go with her.

I made it 150 feet from the house before feeling dizzy and nauseous.

I made my apologies and retreated back the the house, leaving Erin and Sana to catch buses.

I'm now coughing again and my head won't stop spinning. I'm seeing transparent yellow patches swirling over the wallpaper.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.