There's a pair of purposes to this journal.
One of them is to induce me to write. I used to write a lot, and I miss it from time to time, but I'm very aware that without a fair amount of writing that it's easy to slip into a decline of quality. I want to use this to splurge out and just write whatever comes into my head, so I can hen go through afterwards and pick and choose the bits worth saving (which I can then put in a more permanent place).
The other is to keep notes, drop in ideas and generally use it as a notepad/journal.
Hopefully I'll keep this up to date...
It's funny how easily emotion gets between you and where you want to go. The slightest thing (whether real of imagined) interjects itself into my consciousness and suddenly, rather than sending a perfectly cogent logical reply, I'm taking this piss and engaging in sarcasm of a non-productive variety.
It always feels provoked to me, but after doing it I'm usually left wondering why I did it at the time (well, it feels good, that's probably why). Of course, other people are like this too, and all it takes is one person to misinterpret the other, sarcasm ensues, sooner or later someone steps over the line and we're into a phase of snideness, then if we're not careful it's downhill all the way to nastiness and not returning emails.
Of course, this is a lot more common on the net, where there isn't the instant feedback from the other person to let you know that they didn't mean to imply that you have candyfloss for a brain, and you can tell from the look on their face that they were just kidding about you having all the taste of a rhinocerous.
But surely, at the age of 29, I ought to be able to deal with this kind of thing and not flare up. I'm sure I expected to be adult by now but I'm still waiting for the adulthood to kick in.
Oh well, maybe when I'm 30...
You know how it is. 9:25 on a Friday night. Your body has pretty muich shut down, but it's still just that little bit too early to go to bed.
Nothing seems like fun any more. Even putting on your favourite music doesn't seem to help - it just seems somehow tinny no matter how much you pump up the bass.
Yup, there's nothing for it but to jump online and surf radnomly until it gets late enough to justify collapsing into bed (where, undoubtably, sleep will fail to come for just long enough to be irritating).
God, I have a horrible feeling that this Journal will actually be therapeutic.
Meanwhile, the gaming discussions continue on the T2M list. My initial burst of 'yay!' at the thought of fabuloso gaming has faded once I remembered that first of all there's going to be weeks of wrangling and whining over what we're going to do. Once Christmas is over, hopefully it'll work out for the best...
Idea! I shall go and play Counterstrike! My reactions will be shit, but hopefully somebody elses will be shitter!