And you love old-school, original, Kirk-slash-Spock the best, right?
And what you _really_ want for Christmas is Zachary "I'm Spock Too!" Quinto to read you some Kirk/Spock, right?
Then you can thank your lucky stars that someone took the audio files of him reading something else entirely, and cut/pasted it together in a terribly rude manner.
Original post here. Video was taken off YouTube, but there are copies floating around. There's one here for instance...
HO! HO! HO!