Andrew Ducker (andrewducker) wrote,
Andrew Ducker
andrewducker

Empathy is a double-edged sword

Exhibit a) Woken by the mouse again last night, which must have wandered in at 3am after Julie popped out to the toilet, and then got stuck in the room when she closed the door on her way back. We couldn't find it, so in the end we opened the door and went back to sleep, thinking it would wander out on its own (and both being exhausted enough to sleep through it). I mentioned to Julie that I thought it had sounded weird moving, asymmetric, as if it had a damaged leg. So this morning she went to check that there weren't any blood stains or similar at one of the traps, and instead found a dead mouse in one of them, it's tail sticking out. It will have been instant, and it was necessary, as it just wasn't going for the humane trap at all, but she was still very upset by it, and I didn't enjoy the feeling much either. I'd enjoyed occasionally encountering it, nose sniffing the air from a safe spot, before it vanished off to hide wherever it lived. I could absolutely empathise with this feeling.

Exhibit b) After feeling rubbish because Julie's life has been in stasis waiting for her results to come back, they did. A positive result on the BCR/ABLtest would have been 10%. She got 0.9%, which is excellent*, and gives a really good prognosis. She's considered entirely in remission when she hits 0.001%, so there's a way to go yet, but it's a really good start. It hasn't really sunk in yet, particularly because I was out late last night at a work Christmas do, and so am feeling somewhat disassociated today, but there's definitely a feeling of lightness and movement starting to show.

*Julie thinks this is a typo for 9%. I think she worries too much, and is denial of the possibility of good news.



Original post on Dreamwidth - there are comment count unavailable comments there.
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

  • 11 comments